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How to live with someone in chronic pain?

Do you know that 100 million people in the United States suffer with chronic(慢性的)pain? Living with someone in chronic pain can be demanding at times because the person doesn't feel well and wants your help to feel better. Yet you are powerless to do much about stopping their pain. As a result, much of the relationship can become focused on pain which is depressing for both of you. But people in pain need emotional support. They need to know that you understand their feelings. So, express it in your words and show it by your presence.

Now, realize, there is a fine line between helping and hurting when talking with people in chronic pain. You help by encourage pain free talk, by focusing on tfie positives of your relationship and other aspects of the person's life. Instead of asking, “How is your pain today?" ask, “How is your day going?" Then, focus on what is going right or is positive despite the pain. This isn't ignoring the reality of their pain, rather focusing away from the pain. Constant conversations about pain increase pain. The more attention you give pain, the more it multiplies pain.

The more you do things for the person in pain, the more likely they are to become disabled by their pain. For example, if your partner can move, get up or get their own drink, let them. Even if it takes a while to accomplish something, movement is good for chronic pain. The goal is not to do things they can do for themselves. Otherwise, you are enabling sick behavior. Therefore, encourage, but don't enable! You don’t want anyone's identity to be developed around the pain.

Remember, chronic pain has caused your partner to limit his behavior and not do the things he used to do. He is dealing with loss and has to find a new normal. Talk about what can be done to improve functioning despite the pain. You may have to get creative! Can you throw a ball to the grandkids sitting down? Maybe you can find a more comfortable position for closeness.

Finally, do all you can to help him remain social even though the pain may lead to a cancellation with friends now and then. When that happens, you are supposed to keep inviting him to gatherings as he wants to remain active and involved. The worse thing a person in pain can do is get separated from others. Not only will they become depressed but it is much easier to lose hope. And there is so much you can do to improve functioning and get on with your life.

In sum, chronic pain can cause relationship tension, but a focus on small things that turn down the volume on pain and improve your day to day functioning will help your relationships.

How to live with someone in chronic pain?
Passage outlines	Supporting details
The phenomenon about people in chronic pain	There are a large number of people 1.from chronic pain. We need to show our understanding by keeping them 2..
3. to showing them our understanding.	▲ When it4.to chronic pain, pay more 5.to the positives and what is going right instead of focusing on the pain itself. ▲6.them to move as much as they can instead of enabling sick behaviors. ▲Keep their loss in mind and help them to find a new way to improve functioning in 7.of the pain. ▲ Even if he may cancel gatherings 8., try to keep a person in pain active and involved.
9.	By focusing on small useful things and improving day to day functioning, we will live in 10.with someone in chronic pain.